YOU CAN RUN....BUT CAN YOU HIDE???

I read an article about how Brazil is trying to shed the image as a fugitives' haven. It basically reaffirmed to me that there are a lot of narcissistic criminals out there who feel entitled to do as they please and not face the consequences of their actions. 

As convicted murderer and paedophile Phillip Smith relaxed in a hostel on a cobbled street in Rio de Janeiro, having successfully absconded from the authorities in his native New Zealand, he sent an email to a radio station - basically bragging about how he got away!! 

The 40-year-old was on a 72-hour release from prison ( WHY??? Boy Scout meeting??) when, using a passport in his original name, Phillip Traynor, he took a flight to Chile and then onto Brazil. His escape, he said, had only been "moderately difficult". What??? And I am the one taking off my shoes and belt while following a senior citizen in a walker who is being patted down by airport security! 

Phillip was, he imagined, the latest in a long line of successful fugitives to make their home in Brazil - including Great Train robber Ronnie Biggs, who lived for decades in Rio, and Josef Mengele, the notorious Nazi concentration camp doctor. But hours after checking into the Rio hostel, he was arrested by members of Brazil's Federal Police. Yeah, Police - 1, Phillip - 0.

Well, that's what happens when you get cocky, just like, Michael Misick who enjoyed a lifestyle every bit as glamorous as his fiefdom's numerous celebrity guests as premier of the Turks and Caicos Islands. From premier to prisoner. 

Despite declaring assets of only $50,000 when elected in 2003, six years later he lived in a 16 million dollar mansion and had allocated his then-wife Lisa Raye McCoy a clothing budget of up to $200,000 a month! It's a tropical climate....bathing suit - check, t shirt - check, shorts - check.

After an inquiry in 2009, Mr Misick left the Caribbean amid claims that he had illegally profited from multi-million-dollar sell-offs of Crown land. Well, he didn't get all that money selling tours to tourists. He resurfaced in Rio and being in the "you can't touch me" club, he continued his lavish lifestyle in an apartment near Ipanema beach.

He is said to have chosen Brazil because of an ambiguity in its 1997 extradition treaty with the UK which meant as a subject of a British colony he could not be extradited. HA! You silly bugger....not so. Mr Misick was arrested in December 2012 and ended up in Ary Franco, a prison run by the state government of Rio de Janeiro. Sadly, A UN subcommittee had earlier that year described the jail as "dark, dirty, steamy and cockroach-infested" and demanded its immediate closure. Bad lucky, chappie!

It was from his prison cell that Mr Misick then mounted a letter-writing campaign condemning the British government and complaining that he was "perishing" in jail. I have no idea what happened to his ex-wife and all of her clothing.

Another who faced a strikingly similar situation was Irish lawyer Michael Lynn.

Wanted over an alleged mortgage fraud, he fled Ireland in 2007 with debts of $90m. He set up a new life for himself and his family in a villa near the beach city of Recife, while starting up a new company to have another shot at becoming a property tycoon.

He openly registered himself with the authorities, apparently sure that the fact his wife Brid had had a Brazilian-born child meant - like train robber Ronnie Biggs - he could not be extradited.

But he, too, was misinformed - that law had been repealed in the 1990s. Can't these guys do The Google???

So, if YOU want to become a criminal and need a safe haven to hide out in  (not necessarily a cold Communist country) ...here are six places in the world where you can do this...successfully:

Croatia, Kazakhstan, Dubai, Bhutan and Western Sahara (under Morocco's guidance). And Cuba - for now. Just - Keep your head down and blend in. Good luck!!!

Things I have learned this week:

Every year it just gets better.

Grammy Awards 2015 - What the hell???

On the left is our Madge...looking like a really, really bad pirate. Then Kim K in a sparkly bathrobe. Rhianna in.....pink???? I've seen a Barbie birthday ake topper similar to this dress...... and someone else who just has bad taste. How are these people allowed to go out their front door without someone stopping them and explaining that MAYBE they have made a bad choice. Gee - seemed like a good idea at the time.


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There is a Lego version of the Fifty Shades of Grey trailer. It has the whispery voice of the female lead...and the lead male who states things like "I don't do romance."....just as insipid as the real trailer I am afraid - but the acting is better.

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And again with the Fifty Shades - "Love" shops are expecting to have a rise in sales once the movie hit the theatres......unfortunately the emergency wards are also gearing up!

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Woman finds image of Jesus in dog's ear.....I am not kidding

Must have been a slow news day.